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here's what it's been looking like outside.
so, here's what we've been doing inside.
"rolly polly pancakes" for breakfast. think lazy man's crepes. yummy, easy and QUICK! we like them with peanut butter, strawberry jam, bananas, walnuts, raisins and apples cooked in butter and cin-in-in-amins.
next is storytime. . .
the narration goes something like this:
"Where is Hoops (the horse)?"
"Where is my friend?"
"Where is Hoops? Hoops, the pony is asleep. we can't wake him up."
"So, we walked up the stairs, so we went for a walk. . . where is my friend?"
"Would you look at that big tree? Wooooow. We can't climb up there cause there's a tree up there, so let's go home now."
I love that he wants to tell stories. he can tell stories with anyone/anything. sometimes even his granola bar has adventures!
we talk about Spring a lot and all the fun things we'll do when it thaws. today, though, it's so pretty out there, it's hard to be mad at Winter.
there's a myriad of feelings that come along with the news of a second baby coming. for me, these feelings manifest most intensely at night. for a long time i have had issues with insomnia. it comes and goes. sometimes it's worse than others. the whole problem became an even bigger obstacle when bb was born and was not what you would call "a good sleeper." after he finally started to sleep through the night, i couldn't. it took a long time to get there for me. i remember feeling so angry that now that i was "allowed" to sleep, i couldn't and it seemed so insanely unfair.
so, lately, with all that is on my mind, i wake up at roughly 3:10am every morning and from then until 6:30 or 7 when bb wakes up, i fall asleep, wake up, fall asleep and repeat. this makes for interesting dreams.
2 nights ago i dreamed i met the Go-Go's. yes, i'm a big fan. but i've never harbored any secret desire to hang out with them. i mean, to me they are the finest girl band we had in the 80s, sure, but i never wanted to be their pal, you know? after i met them and we chatted it up for a while, we went to Paris. not me and the girls--me and hubby. i also dreamed not long ago that me and hubby went to London.
before i learned of baby #2, i started to feel like it'd be fun to take a trip. maybe even, dare i say it, out of the country. bb is old enough now to have us go away. a grandparent could come be with him for a few days.
but now. now that there is a baby coming, i see my freedom going away again. just when i was getting it back. all i can think of lately is taking a trip. i feel like escaping. i feel afraid of "going back" to the sleepless days. the "we can't go anywhere" days. i feel like i want to run away. not for real. i don't mean take off on my family, i mean, go away for a week with a girlfriend, you know?
i'm scared. having a second child is big. i wondered if i could handle one and i could, so i can only imagine that i can handle having 2.
but seriously, what's with the Go-Go dream? i think part of me wants my youth back.
do you ever feel that way?
help! i need ideas.
got toddlers at home? how do you keep them engaged and busy all day?
it's snowy and really freakin' cold here right now. everyday for 3 hours i have another 2.5 year old to take care of. while this is nice because they do entertain each other, lately there's a lot of competition, arguing, wanting to be first/best. it's draining.
i used to do a really good job of keeping a rhythm and i think they needed that. we had a loose schedule of things we did, but i tell you it's so much easier when it includes outside time.
we do some activities out in the world. today we go to the library for story time, tomorrow we go to a playgroup at the local community center, thursdays we sometimes go to the splash pool if the smell of the pool doesn't make me sick.
but there is still a lot of time in the day where i have one or two toddlers who are bored. i'm feeling gross most of the time. tired. low energy. but i have to try harder to give the guys some things to do.
so. . . help! do you have any activities to do indoors with your kids that they like? how do you deal with boredom and/or cabin fever? any ideas would be welcome!
nothing makes pregnancy more real than an ultrasound.
i have felt so guilty and sad that i haven't been really excited about the new baby. i mean, sure, deep down, of course. but on the surface, all i can do is focus on getting thru the day to day of feeling sick. so far not a lot of pleasure has come from the pregnancy. i feel sick 24/7.
emotionally i haven't felt really connected to the fact that there's a new being forming. that there is a life beginning. until today.
today we had an ultrasound whose main purpose was to confirm the due date. once that was determined more accurately my midwife can order yet another ultrasound for a couple weeks from now. since my last pregnancy i've turned 35. so, now i have to jump thru all these hoops.
i thought a lot about it. for a long time i thought i wouldn't do anything differently than last time. why should i? what will it change? but then i started to think about bb. i have more at stake, more to consider. his life. how would it be affected if we had an unhealthy second child? how could i prepare for that? so, we've agreed to do the extra ultrasounds and meet with the genetic specialist, but that's it. the amnio freaks me out. the size of the needle alone is reason enough to run.
but today. today we saw our little "kidney bean" and s/he was right there. all tucked in and safe and snug inside me. heart beating. arms, legs, spine all sprouting. everything looked as good as it could. and hubby and i cried looking at the little tiny dude-to-be.
it's funny how different it is from the last time. and also the same.
