30 April 2007

the poop post

i know it's not a fun topic, but it needs to be discussed. i need your input.

we're talking a lot about potty training this summer. bb goes to preschool in the fall. new baby comes in the fall. would LOVE to have only one butt in diapers, you know? while bb's school is okay with him not being totally there potty-wise, i'd like it if he could be.

so, how did you do it? have you got a boy who's been through the potty training realm? i have to tell you i feel completely unprepared and at a loss for what to do. how to do it. how to approach it. i've always felt i had good instincts about how to do whatever i needed to do in the parenting world, but with this i just feel like. . . "ugh. HOW?"

if you can, tell me what worked for you and what didn't. how'd you get started? how long did it take? what were the best books you used to help him "get it." was there a moment where you felt like it "was time" to start?

on a different, yet related note. this pregnancy is so different from the previous. it's been harder. way. not only do i *still* get sick (i'm 20 weeks going on 21), but i'm achy and painy in weird places AND (lucky me) i'm severly constipated nearly all the time. whoo hoo!

i've never experienced anything like it. nothing seems to help. i've tried it all. prunes. prune juice. smoothies. smoothies with fiber and flax seed added. fiber drinks. lots of water. lots of apple juice. i'm bound bound bound up no matter what i do. it's painful. it's gross. i feel. . . gross most of the time. i have to resort to suppositories every 4 days or so in order to not explode. it's the only way to get anything out.

if this happened to you during your pregnancy and you found something to be helpful when all else failed, please PLEASE please share your wisdom. i'm dying over here.

18 April 2007


hey, thanks for all the nice congratulatory comments. it's very sweet to have so many nice blogger buddies chime in like that.

we're still in shock over here. there was no expectation of a girl. i may have mentioned this before, but there is only 1 (ONE) girl in 3 generations hubby's family. they just "don't make girls." so, we figured why should it be any different for us? so, we're floored.

there were lots of "signs" or as we call them "waking dreams" telling us it could be a girl right down to bb always saying he was having a sister whenever we asked which he wanted or thought it would be, but we thought we were reading too much into it, after all, his family "don't make girls."

speaking of bb. he was SO SWEET at the ultrasound. he stood beside me on a little bench with daddy and he kept stroking my arm. he'd say, "i'm giving you gentle touches, mommy!" "are you okay?" "does your tummy feel okay?" he was so good to me. so caring.

when the technician said (with no build up or ceremony) "baby's a girl." i began to cry. bb said, "why you sad, mommy? you okay?" totally not yet able to understand tears of joy, though daddy and i tried to explain the concept as best we could.

i think it wasn't until we were driving home that hubby and i were able to admit to each other how much we wanted a little girl. and it's been hard to tell our friends who wanted girls and didn't get them. i have 2 friends who recently had their second boys and so badly wanted number 2 to be a girl. i have another--my oldest, dearest friend in the world --who has 4 boys who desperately wanted a girl. each time she'd say, "trying for a girl ONE more time." i haven't even told her yet. i feel awful about it. of course i had no control, but still.

on the way home from the ultrasound where we found out bb was a boy, hubby and i went out for cheeseburgers. i think it was what i was craving. so, this time we all 3 went out. got us some burgers and shared a mondo hot fudge caramel brownie sundae together. which was a big deal for bb because he hardly ever eats sweets. we toasted with our spoonfuls. "to a baby sister! CHEERS! *clink*"

14 April 2007

the ultrasound is in. . .

and we couldn't be more excited.

10 April 2007

trying to chill

does anyone remember in the movie Say Anything when Lloyd tells. . . somebody, "you must CHILL!!!?" i think they are at a party or something. the same party where Lily Taylor's character is singing about joe. "joe steals. joe lies." strumming her guitar so badly.

anyone remember that? i didn't make it up, did i?

i hope not, because everyday i hear John Cusack in my head telling me i must chill.

we're trying to sell our house and buy a new one at the same time. it's freaking me out. i have no idea how people do this. what if we find a great place and no one wants our old one? what if the opposite happens? what if no one likes our house? i love my house. i think it's cool and comfy. i 'm not sure i can take it if people criticize it.

i feel afraid that somehow i'll end up having to settle or i'll have to live somewhere i don't want to. which is silly, i know, because i can just not move. problem is our lives change a lot come september and this house doesn't suit those changes, so i sorta feel like we have to move. and then i feel the pressure. and it turns me into a sleepless freak. and lloyd starts running around my head.

lloyd, dude, i'm trying.

04 April 2007

reality tv--the good stuff

i'm not a big fan of reality shows, really. sure, i watched a couple seasons of The Real World. mostly because of the locations. i lived in seattle, so of course i watched the seattle RW. i definitely never liked the mean spirited ones. voting people off and such. boooo. no thanks.

not until Trading Spaces came along was i ever really intrigued by reality tv. (unless What Not To Wear counts.) and then i fell for The Amazing Race. which i love. i love the competition and i love the locations. the drama is secondary. (yes, i'm loving the All-Star Race that's currently going on and yes, i'm very happy that rob and ambah are out of it. they give boston a bad name.)

hubby and i just watched on DVD the best thing i have ever seen in the reality genre. it's called Frontier House. have you seen it? it's the PBS's answer to reality tv. and it's fascinating. the basic outline is that they take 3 modern families (from 5,000 applicants) and plop them in 1883 in the Montana territory. they are given "lessons" on how things work in those days. the clothing, the cooking/baking, livestock care (and slaughtering), building, gardening. the basics of homesteading, really. then they are taken via horse drawn wagons to their new home. for 5 months they have to survive. they have to barter. they have to ration. they have to make a homestead function.

they are given *somewhat* fictitious back-story that is based on their own lives. this comes into play most importantly when they are shown their new home. the career of the homesteader in "real life" sort of determines what they get when they show up. one family has a fully finished cabin, one is part done and one (the smallest family--a father and son) have nothing. NO-THING. they have to build a home from scratch. right down to picking the site.

there's a lot to be said about this show. but, since this is a parenting blog, i'm going to focus on the experience of the kids on the show and my experience as a mom watching it.

there were 2 teenage girls. at first they couldn't deal with the loss of make-up and material things. then a few months down the road as one is digging in the garden she talks about having a sense of purpose now and feeling like a better person.

they have no tv or video games. no malls. all they have is nature, the work of the homestead and wooden toys and playing cards. so, the families spend time together instead. and it's beautiful. yes, there's some typical reality show cattyness and us vs. them, but the show is not really about that.

the most striking aspect of the show for me is in the "character" of a boy. he must have been 8 or 10 years old. this kid was addicted to his Play Station before he came to Montana. eventually, he talks about how he loves it there because his dad has time to teach him things. to teach him to fish or to build a chicken coop. he gets to spend time with dad because dad's not off at work. at home he hardly saw him. this kid is thriving. he's alive in nature. feeling his sense of purpose. being helpful. not wasting away in front of the tube. he's contributing and he feels good about it. as do the teen girls.

the most poignant moment is at the end. we flash forward to 2 months after they leave Montana to return to the year 2001 (yes, they experience 9/11 while away in 1883). the kids talk about how boring it is. all they do is go to the mall. there's nothing to do. they are surrounded by so much "stuff" that they feel like there's nothing in it for them. this little boy talks about how much more fun and special it was to recieve small gifts while he was in Montana. his grandmother brought him a wooden checkers set and sling shots for his birthday and that was so meaningful because he didn't have any toy or game at his fingertip like he did at home. less is more to him and most kids, i think.

and they said at home it's lonely. isolated. more isolated than being off in the mountains with no outside contact. they are in a big house. and miss the closeness of the one room cabin. of family.

it's fascinating and a little sad.

for hubby and i. . . it made us feel like our choice to put bb in a waldorf school next year for pre-school was the right thing. a school where he'll learn to take care of chickens and goats, he'll make butter and bread, he'll tell stories with simple knit toys and build with wooden blocks and stumps. he'll be in a simple one room schoolhouse. he'll learn purposeful play and purposeful work.

it's pricey. it's "crunchy." and it's just right.

it's funny, this show has actually made us think about HOW we live and what we might change now that we're house shopping. rural sounds good.